10 rules to dating my daughter

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We have seen so many young girls dressing as if something was for sale.

Dressing as if no one in their life was speaking any wisdom into their lives.

Here’s what I presented to him: “10 Simple Rules for Dating My Millennial Daughter": Rule 1.

Must always root for the underdog, prefer baseball to football, jazz to rap, fall to spring, Fitzgerald to Faulkner, pubs to opera, Montana to Marino, tailgate parties to weddings, dogs to cats, Mel Brooks to Albert Brooks, Matisse to Michelangelo, Bartles to Jaymes. By the second date, you must have it memorized.)Rule 2. Must be able to absorb 0,000 in daughter’s college debt without holding a grudge or feeling like you saved half of Europe from starvation. Must be willing to advise me on various harebrained business ventures, such as my latest: Selling hemp hats to disgruntled hipsters. Must know how to tell a joke: A bear walked into a bar ...

Once upon a time, callow young men almost always met their dates’ dads.

This ritual vetting was an important part of protecting the human species from random romantic mistakes.

They’re creepy at best, downright disturbing and misogynistic at worst.

Yes, these messages are actually printed on shirts, that some dads proudly wear.

In our case, when Brittany was young, we wanted to instill a modest dressing policy.

We’ve all seen the viral, “rules for dating my daughter” posts, right?

The ones that use intimidation, fear, and sometimes even the threat of a firearm to warn teenage boys just how to behave around the girls they date?

That they are fierce, competent women who will be able to make sound decisions and take care of themselves — without a dad looming over their dates and scowling in the background.

“I was raised in an religious home,” Welch explains to Scary Mommy.

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