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These companies are nothing but vultures, co-opting the language of activism.

Q: I've been seeing this girl and we've really been hitting it off. But my gut reaction is to ghost and never look back—I don't want herpes! – Jason, San Antonio A: Finding out your partner has herpes can be a bombshell at any point in the relationship. But it is not nearly as unique or earth-shattering as you think it is. I know there a lot of thoughts and anxieties swirling in your head—about your partner’s health, about your health, about your partner’s fidelity, about your future (or lack thereof) with your partner—and we’ll get to all that.

Having a minor skin condition in common is a shoddy foundation for a healthy relationship.

I’ve dated people with herpes and I’ve dated people without it.

Which leads me to my next concern: these websites and apps are not created by people with STIs, or by people who are openly STI positive.

One of the first emails I received when I went viral way back in April 2015 was from a woman claiming to work for Positive (I say claiming because she wasn’t using a Positive Singles email address). I don’t want to endorse a product I would never personally use.

My head tells me to handle this like a mature gentleman.

If you’ve been physically intimate, freaking out was probably your first reaction (Do I now have herpes? Then come the other questions: Is herpes a deal breaker? But first, let’s get straight on what herpes is and what it isn’t.

I would ignore these pop-ups as they inevitably fail, one after the other, except they .

They reach out to me, share my posts and my talks on their social media platforms, and contact my fellow activists when I refuse to collaborate with them.

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